Wednesday, August 27, 2008

you have been poked

Column eight. These are really flying by. Soon I'll have to write some new ones!

I unashamedly love Facebook. I love how easy the social networking website makes it to stay in touch with people. I love finding out what long lost friends are up to, and I embrace the easy access to my friends’ photos.

But, of course, there are cons. I don’t like people inviting me to add stupid applications, I hate that I am forced to speak in third person when updating my status, and I could do without the friend requests from people I met once at the party of a mutual friend.

Additionally, I am annoyed I have the capacity to so closely monitor the goings on of my ex boyfriend.

Clarification: I am not a stalker. I am, however, curious. I am curious to know who exactly Stacey King is and why she’s calling my ex “babe”. And Sophie Chambers, who are you and what are you doing in my house?

It’s not dissimilar to driving past a car accident. You know your stomach will churn at the sight of the carnage but you look anyway.

Mr X has every right to be with someone new, and he certainly has every right to have new friends, female or otherwise. I know and respect this. Truth be told, if he’s found someone else, I’d rather not know just yet. But I check out his Facebook page once every couple of weeks anyway.

In a true sign loyalty, my friend recently admitted to starting her own who-the-hell-is-Stacey? campaign. She’d noticed Stacey had befriended my ex on her “news feed” and pledged her cyber allegiance by following the trail to find out all she could. Turns out that wasn’t much, but it’s the thought that counts.

So, I guess this means I’m going through a new-age breakup. I probably knew this a few months ago when the ex and I synchronized watches and took the plunge to change our Facebook relationship status. Delightfully, Facebook took the liberty of announcing to all 374 of my friends that “Kate Jacka and (insert boy’s name here) have ended their relationship”

It wasn’t a secret, but there are better and more personal ways of breaking the news to people.

Moving on. I have opted to go relationship status-less. I am nothing. It wasn’t right to have “in a relationship” any longer but I wasn’t ready to have the word “single” under my name either. It felt weird. As if single was akin to “ready to pick up, any takers?” Not so for exxy. He is single. Available. No longer mine. Possibly someone else’s.

When the times comes, and I am once more in a relationship, or engaged, or even married, I wonder whether I’ll feel guilty having my ex find out through Facebook.

Maybe instead of “Kate Jacka went from being single to in a relationship” I can arrange for Facebook to let him know that “after what she perceives a respectable time frame, Kate Jacka has moved on and is seeing someone new. She is really happy, and hopes you are too. Despite her new beau, she will always remember you fondly.”

Maybe I should just tell him that myself. Or send a text.

1 comment:

Rick M said...

Love in the digital sweet. Breaking up in high definition, not so cool.

Maybe if you find someone else you can tell ex about it in binary scrawled on the back of an iPhone?

I'm so postmodern...

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