Tuesday, July 28, 2009

peace out, again

more holidays. yes, it's unfair. but on you, not me, so that's okay.

it does mean another moratorium has been placed on camelshoes.

i know, i hadn't heard that word either until saturday night. and neither had anyone in my office when i just called out 'what's the word beginning with m, ending in torium that means hiatus'. blank stares. i was trying to google the spelling because, god forbid, i published an error on camelshoes.

my friend used moratorium during a casual conversation over saturday night dinner. i felt she deserved the jibes which followed given, among friends, she could have said 'break' or 'hiatus'. in her defence, she's certainly smart rather than showy and now i know a new word.

i promised her i'd use it on sunday. i didn't so this is my compensation.

so yes, holiday. whoo hoo. me. little sister. greece. 10 days. it better look like this.



and i better look tan-o-rexic when i get back - hopefully with many a potential blog posts at the ready.

until then, much love....

xx

Friday, July 24, 2009

a different kind of writer's block

so, i have this work-in-progress blog post sitting in my drafts folder. it’s about two thirds finished i’d guess. and it says a hell of a lot. but it’s been sitting untouched for about 24 hours now because, like never before, i am second guessing whether uploading it on the www is what i want to do.

in a nutshell, the blog explains why i went through sad slash angry slash emancipating period three-ish months ago. it also, finally, divulges who these two life-changing encounters were with and how they went (amazingly well and quite well respectively, fyi).

so, i’m typing away. words are falling onto the screen with ease and i‘m happy to finally be getting it off my chest. early in the piece, i explain that the main reason the post had taken me so long to write was because it so heavily involved others. see, it’s all well and good for me to be (kind of) comfortable writing about my life on camelshoes but not so fair to take the same liberty with outsiders – regardless of how big a part of my life they are.

as the furious typing continued, i started to realise just how much i am letting go. i tried to write with caution but i was in a rhythm. i wasn’t thinking. just spilling. all of a sudden i had said a lot more than i’d intended.

the thing is, i could sit down with any one of my readers* – seriously, anyone of you – over a coffee or, more likely, a red wine, and tell you all about it. no holes. no editing. no problem. but online for the world to see? if it was all me, sure. or if the second party involved could remain anonymous, like here and here, fine. but, regardless of omitting names, there would be no secret who these people were. and although the post was ultimately positive, completely accurate and certainly not vindictive, it was still personal.

so, where’s the line? and when will i cease starting sentences with ‘so’? the answer to one of those questions is simple. never. the other? not so much.

i have gained so much from writing about my struggles, past and present, over the past few months. and i have never had such a positive response to my blog – from friends, acquaintances and strangers alike. plus, this period of my life has been hugely significant so i feel as though brushing over it on camelshoes wouldn’t do it (the blog or the story) justice. lastly, my best writing derives from honesty so i don’t really want to sensor myself.

but none of these things trump maintaining respect for the privacy of others.

what do you think? to post or not to post?


*that sounded so wanky

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

i need a holiday

yo...i'm back from holidays and appropriately exhausted. so much to tell you. so much. but right now laundry and sleep beckon.

meanwhile, here's a picture of the world's prettiest city. 10 points if you can guess where it was taken.


more words soon.

x

Friday, July 3, 2009

berlin, procrastination and a timely farewell

091 Three sleeps until Berlin. Can I get a hell yeh?!

092 My feet cannot handle tales of physical woe. When someone is telling a yucky story about blood, guts, horrid injuries and the like, my feet suffer an exaggerated version of pins and needles in my trotters. I have to crouch or sit down or, preferably, leave the room.

093 I was there when Michael Bevan hit a four off the last ball to beat the West Indies in 1996. It was unforgettable. Second only, as far as my memories of live sport go, to watching the Cowboys beat the Broncos in the 2004 semi-final. Australia’s semi-final tie with South Africa in the 1999 Cricket World Cup and the Cowboys’ qualifying final victory over the Bulldogs in 2004 would probably be my all-time favourite sporting moments. Being in Sydney during the 2000 Olympics was also pretty amazing.

094 I cannot roll my tongue.

095 It doesn’t matter how much I have to do, or how little time I have to do it, I always find time to procrastinate. I constantly amaze myself at how fine I will cut a deadline. For that reason, journalism suits me to a tee.

096 Luke Perry posters adorned my walls during a good few of my younger years. How very embarrassing.

yeh, i'm pretty sure i had this exact poster.

097 I am very feisty but I hate conflict. I will avoid it at all (or at least most) costs but, once involved, I generally make a strong and assertive-bordering-on-aggressive case.

098 My elbows are double-jointed. It freaks people out but, to me, it just looks and feels normal.

099 I’ve spent more than 27 of my 28 years as a brunette. Blonde was a fun but costly experiment. I don’t know how anyone can be bothered going to the hairdressers that often. Au naturale, I probably drag myself to the hairdressers three times a year. In the eight months I boasted goldie locks, I was spending a fortune every five weeks. It also destroyed my hair’s condition but I don’t regret it.

100 (And what a note to end on) I’ve booked my ticket home, baby!! With me on board, a big plane with Cathay Pacific branding will be touching down in Sydney on September 23. I have loved living in London and will miss it here. But I am so excited to be heading home. How lucky I am to feel that way. How lucky I am full stop.

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